“All my life, I have tried to find the truth and make it beautiful.” – Sting
I paint in pursuit of a truth. It’s not about recreating what I see in front of me.
I aim – though not always successfully – to penetrate the theatrics of how someone presents themselves. I can never completely ignore the histrionics of vanity – I am occasionally fueled by it.
As levels of trust are bestowed, I paint to express the story of a life. Revealing its glorious successes and humbling failures; seeking out and luxuriating in all the joys and perhaps sharing in – indeed empathizing with – the pains that have shaped the person in front of me; creating a visual representation of how that person (and their story) has affected me and changed me… and sharing their strength and conviction.
“We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.” – T. S. Eliot
I find the process of discovering and portraying someone’s essence – capturing the human condition – as fascinating as I find it inspiring. I find it therapeutic.
When a painting flows – that thoughts and feelings and paint and brush are all communicating well and easily – I feel like I’m in a conversation with a great teacher or therapist; that I’m creating something that is building me up, while systematically breaking down my prohibitive barriers.
This gives me hope.
To mine own self be true…
Wherever I may be lacking in my life; whatever struggle or character defects I am working with at the moment, I feel more confident moving forward knowing that I am in pursuit of – and guided by – a higher purpose, challenging myself to be a better more honest and forthright person – which I am learning is not synonymous with kindness… I believe this quality can make me a better therapist and artist.
As a therapist, I wear my own brand of confidence. I am comfortable enough to follow rules and principles as they were taught and confident enough to bend and break those rules as needed.
As an artist, I am continually striving to find a voice and… whether kind or cold; beautiful or ugly… please God, make it honest.